Jump to content
Erin

Worst Mistakes in Love

Recommended Posts

So peeps, I fucked up BIG TIME 3 days ago, but I'm really busy rite naw to spill it all out. But in the meantime, I ask you: What is the biggest mistake, according to you, that you have ever made regarding love and relationships? I sure have mine now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Heh, I've got a few:

- I was in camp and I was about 12 or so, starting 8th grade in the fall. Since the campgrounds were really far away we would have to take a bus to get there and back every day and on this bus there was a girl named Adell. She preferred the name Meaghan though. I fell for this girl HARD but I had the unfortunate luck of having a douchebag of an acquaintance who I loathe to call friend hang around me at every moment of the day. He knew I liked her and acted like he was going to help me out and then all he did was undermine my efforts and ended up walking away with the girl at the end of the day. I just got a fistful of regret.

- Later that year when I was in eighth grade, the popular kids started realizing that I was going to be that kid in the class that gets somewhere and was going to be moderately successful, so they all decided to try and get someone to date me for some odd reason. I bowed in to peer pressure and naturally they only threw popular girls at me and I picked one. This led to much embarrassment as all this did was bloat said girl's ego. To this day people won't let me live it down. The guys really did have good intentions for me but...the choice of girl that we had wasn't very large.

- About a year after that there was a girl at school that was moderately cute so I decided to do something about it and see where it went. She had wild mood swings though and her mood would change rapidly and often. School year came to an end and I decided I'd try and cut back some contact with her so I could breathe and figure out if I still wanted to pursue this. Came back to school in the fall to find out she committed suicide. Still feel like if I was somehow there it wouldn't have happened. This I try not to dwell on.

- About a year after THAT there was a girl in my neighborhood that I really had some feelings for. At the time though I didn't know she was battling leukemia and then things took a turn for the worse and she ended up passing away. That feeling really sucked.

- Then a few months after that I was fixated on this one girl for TWO YEARS. Logic should have told me that it wasn't going anywhere after the first few months but I refused to give up. It all came to a head and I was publicly humiliated. This was part of my reason to withdraw from the social workings of my school and become a ghost.

- Late in my senior year I decided that if I was going to do one thing before I graduated high school it was take a girl on a date and kiss one. I set my sights high because I'd rather aim high and fail than aim low and fail. I failed anyway but not after getting stood up on a date to the movies. Ouch.

- Then went on orientation to college and the second person I met at college was this stunningly beautiful girl that seemed approachable and friendly. As luck would have it, she broke up with her then boyfriend before we even started the school year. Things were looking up! Then when we actually started spending time on campus she was on the south side and I was on the north. Distance aside I decided I'd pursue something and see what happens. Turns out that her boyfriend was an abusive prick and that turned her to drinking and smoking and failing all her classes. The more I tried to help the more she interpreted me as an interloper and all her friends started blocking her and making it hard for us to be friends, much less anything else. She wasn't trying much either, usually skipping out on times we had arranged to hang out and not keep her promises to me. She even switched out of a lab so she wouldn't have to see me! Then one day without warning she just blocked me on Facebook and refused to pick up the phone. I haven't heard from her since, although word is she failed out of the university and had to go back home.

- A little after that I had met someone through a mutual friend and I finally thought something was going to happen. I was interested in her and she was interested in me. She too had also broken up with her boyfriend and I thought that it was my time to step in and do something and she'd love me for it. Nope, all she was doing was using me as her emotional tissue paper and she ended up going back to him. It's worth noting that he too was an abusive prick. Naturally, by this time I was fed up with my constant, continuous failure and exploded on her about how she led me on and after everything I did for her I didn't deserve all the shit she put me through. Then I promptly blocked her from all forms of contact. A few months later I sent her an apology telling her I was sorry for exploding on her but that was it and I wasn't intending on keeping contact with her after that. Turns out she's now the neighborhood skank. Nice choices Zess, nice choices.

- My best mate realized that I was depressed and decided on pairing me up with someone he knew so that the cycle could finally end, since as he put it "I can't be happy if you're not happy". The first girl he put me with gave me the wrong number so when we went on a date I couldn't find her. Had to call him to get the number to find her and she almost got away. But then we went on our date and she didn't seem very keen on trying to make anything of what we had other than just basic friendship. Took the time to tell me afterwards that I wasn't going to get anywhere because she was planning on dating her ex-boyfriend when he came back from the army because he came back and said "baby give me another chance" and she said OK. That's all he had to say. Months of courting her did nothing on my part.

At least I got a date.

- The second one just turned out to be the kind of woman that bends over for anyone without a second thought. She tried to put the moves on me because as she put it "she really liked me and thought I was different from everyone else". The first time I turned her down because I'm sitting here and I don't even freakin' KNOW this chick and she's just throwing herself at me. Felt all types of uncomfortable. She gets all offended because no guy has ever rejected her before and she doesn't know what to do with me. I end up really not liking this chick too much for multiple reasons, including her attitude and her promiscuity, but she tries for the better part of a year to get my attention. When I finally relent one night, to no one's surprise I hope she gets angry again at me. Not because I refused her, but because when I finally give her what she wants she says I'm terrible! ROFL! She knew all along that it wasn't going to be a good experience but she goes off and tells all my friends behind my back that I'm terrible and that it was the worst experience she'd ever had. Most of them were nice enough to tell her that everyone's terrible at something when they don't have any experience and that she shouldn't be judging because if she's had enough experience to say I was the worst she's been around too much. Still, that was an awful experience. I don't regret doing it because it taught be a lot of things no one would be able to tell me - I just wish I didn't have to put up with the months of BS afterwards.

Yep, there are a few more but those are the major ones really.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

6 years ago...

PERSONAL DIARY 028 ~1ST GIRL THAT I LIKE~
I recalled an incident that I liked a girl who likes boys. She was a classmate of mine. There are times that we went to our homes and stuck during traffic and it was rainy.

PERSONAL DIARY 029 ~2ND GIRL THAT I LIKE~
The girl that I'm referring is similar to my classmate that is pretty and timid. I liked her and gave her a teddy bear and chocolates during my birthday.

PERSONAL DIARY 030 ~I BROKE THE FIGURINE~
I was completely nervous during the filming of our project of the Philippine Constitution and I broke the figurine.

2 years after, 4 years ago...

PERSONAL DIARY 055 ~WHAT'S GOING ON?~
What's going on with the girls? They had discriminated boys? Or a plot? It actually changed me a lot and this is the start of the disaster.

PERSONAL DIARY 056 ~HER FACE AS A PAINTING~
She did saw it. It was a mess. She said that she will take a look at it. She is fooling me again.


EDIT: 6 years and 4 years ago was different girls. i elaborated more about them on my latest post on this thread and did not saw this one

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

nothing too bad or anything,

but i wish to have an anger management that i had today that time.

being a 20 yo that time, i was like any other young lad.

stupid, fiery, full spirited and emotionally unstable.

so yeah, it ruins something but i took a lesson from it.

Which makes who i am today. Not bad at all after all.

Things happened for a reason hence i regret nothing :D

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've grown up in a mostly male environnement and know all the complaints about bitches messaging 3 times per hour and not even allowing a day with friends or whatever, so I grew up to be quite allowing and don't message about every small thing happening.

2/3 years ago I got a boyfriend I was really in love with and left him a lot of space, also that if he wanted to break up I would agree right away (I mean, if someone want to break up it means that person doesn't love you anymore, so there's no point in trying to keep him/her isn't it ?) and it would be a clean break up, not the bitchy kind of break up. In fact, seems like it came across as a lack of interest whatsoever and the break up was not clean on his part at all, he was pretty angry and said a lot of things that made no sense for me, and it dragged for a pretty long time.

Maybe he wanted a lot from me, but I know I messed up almost everything in this relationship looking back on it. It was a pretty big mistake.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've never done anything major or anything I regretted except for one thing. And that was never having the courage to ask out a girl I really liked back in school. She was in my orchestra class and played violin like I did. Yeah she was hot, but she was also really smart and kind. I think the worst part was that I eventually found out she liked me back, but I didn't have the balls to confess my feeling to her.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

RECENTLY in college this really cute girl started to talk to me out of the blue. She said i was very cute and had a very bubbly personality and such. Tho sometimes she said i was weird but she "LOVED ME ANYWAYS". We became really good friends fast and all. She would invite me over to her place to play cards and hang out around (she never had bad intentions and the fact that she is very polite and very family oriented - yes asian family). So i was surprised that there are such nice girls out there in life (rare i should say), i thought to myself i need to make a move and before i did I found out she has a boyfriend and all, and im like wtf!

WHY ARE ALL THE NICE AND AMAZING GIRLS OUT THERE TAKEN!

It happens to me all the time.(only met 4 like that tho).

This is a mistake because i should found out if she had anyone in the first place before letting myself get carried away by emotions...Yes im still a bit broken hearted and i still talk to her, but it kinda bothers me in a way.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Hooked up with a guy that played World of Warcraft, turned out he was super bad at the game and embarrassed me on the Internet.

DotA or League of Legends?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

For the sake of the relationship and to avoid "rocking the boat", I tend to let important conflicts slide to the wayside. Especially when I'm focusing on other things like my education and daughter.

With my most recent ex I would stop trying to make compromises because he had a strong "I'm right,you're wrong, and my way is the only way" mentality. I could've signed up for Student Advantage and saved 15% on all my monthly Amtrak travels, but his brother had a bad experience with either that company or a similar one so he wouldn't "allow" me to join. I could've been saving at least $100/year after paying for the annual SA card fees. It's been all my money anyway, so it wouldn't have cost him a penny.

I deal with so much conflict in life that I don't want to deal with conflicts in my relationships. It's a lot for me to work on. (I have improved, and my current boyfriend is less combative as well.)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1 month 3 weeks of my ex trying to contact me, once every week, in all forms of media... after nearly 1 year of being apart...the most recent. texting me essentially that he's at the same event and therefore sees me.. w. t.f. stalker-much? I'm with my new bf... just wow please leave me alone and move on with your fucking life /pardon my language

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh boy, I'm going to vent here because I haven't been able to anywhere else. Without a doubt, my worst mistake "in love" has been my habit of falling for women I can never have and/or obsessively pursuing someone I convince myself I can never have (thus creating the illusion of an endless chase) then panicking and backing the hell up when they suddenly reciprocate.

 

So yes. My biggest (repeated) mistakes are crushing on girls I can't have, fleeing if/when they change their mind, and failing at maintaining friendships after ~love~ drama.

My current crush is a straight girl. I think it's safer crushing on heterosexuals. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was going to list a bunch out, but I realized that most of my mistakes have mainly been consequences of the central mistake that I am too afraid of conflict and I will do anything just to make people happy or pleased with me. I know love is all about compromise and sacrifice, but I later realized that actions done in love shouldn't always be based on guilt, fear, or pressure. 

 

I also crush heavily on people who end up having appalling personalities (basically, cold-hearted assholes) or who actively dislike me, especially if they are very physically attractive. I end up going through these big spiraling feelings of self-hatred and anger for days and even weeks over this kind of thing. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

1) High School. There's this guy I had liked since junior year. I think he realized that I was interested, and he seemed to reciprocate that too. But I wasn't sure. And I was extremely shy and anxious (and depressed, and pressured as all college-prepping kids do HAH!) Maybe it was partly because of those factors that I never managed to even be his friend. I was even too shy to look at him in the eyes. Asking him to prom was my last chance, and I was still too much of a coward to ask. If I have to meet him again now (4 years later), I still don't know how to face him because I haven't forgiven myself for having been that kind of person... And now that I'm ready to do otherwise, I can't even find anyone to be interested in.

 

2) College. I fell really hard for a guy and gave it my all to pursue him. I didn't give up even when he didn't show much interest, because we had great conversations. Later he told me he's gay (but we're still friends).

 

 

Those are pretty much the only experience in "love" I've had so far, and they've all been mistakes...

 

 

Oh yeah I forgot

3) Getting obsessed with musicians rofl. That's how far I'm removed from reality, since I've never been successful in finding a guy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hmm my worst mistake, dating someone who were 13 when I was 15 (soon to be 16)

 

We were members of the same club, where you had to be 15 to join, so I saw no problem asking her out.

 

After 1 month, she revealed to me her actual age... thank the lord nothing had happened, or I'd gone to jail.

 

I still haven't figured out, how she was able to get a membership...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i tend to like girls who are snobbish

i liked 5 girls in real life but only 2 made huge impacts in my life (the 2nd and the last)

 

i met the first one that made a huge impact when i met her at a walking event in our college

one of my classmate friends try to invite her but i knew that she did not like it

one of my classmates even told me that she liked me but her attitude of being snobbish irritated me

i gave her a teddy bear and i was forced to visit her house being told by my father (her aunt was very strict) 

after failing to get into 3rd year, i shifted to another college

 

the second one was, i really don't know how her attitude was like, somewhat playful

my 4th crush before i met the girl that i'm talking about was asking "did you know my name?", seems very friendly

probably mimicking her lines

she has lots of insinuations, being dramatized by our classmates

she was laughing when i was stunned and when i don't know what to do, going as far to irritate me being being friendly to the boys

i was frustrated and irritated that i quit to attend schools and shifted again for another hobby (blogging and gaming)

when she went to another country, my annoying friend told me that he will miss me and he will go to another country too

my life only became silent when i ignored them for a year, discovering my talent to dub

i probably met one of my classmates that will go to a competition and his crew like the way i carry the voice of a strict father

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
×
  • Create New...