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ANIME TRASH TALK THREAD

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Here's something fun and different for those that have sat through one too many shitty anime. Here is your place to vent. Pick an anime and talk about all the things you hated about it.

 

ALL OPINIONS IN THIS TOPIC ARE OPINIONS. IF YOU ARE EASILY OFFENDED, THIS IS NOT THE TOPIC FOR YOU. CLICK ON ITO'S BANNER TO FIND A MORE...SUITABLE PLACE FOR YOURSELF.

 

TALK IN BOLDED CAPS WITH NUMEROUS EXPLETIVES ARE ENCOURAGED.

 

RIDICULOUS AND FUNNY CRITICISMS ARE ALSO PREFERRED.

 

 

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THERE ISN'T EVEN A PIECE OF ORIGINALITY IN STEINS;GATE. CHARACTERS ARE INSANELY BORING AND THE STORY SUCKS. STFU EVERYONE WHO'LL TAG THIS SHIT AS "SEINEN". "GAIZ I JUST WATCHED VERY SCIENTIFIC ANIME!!1 NOW I FEEL THAT MY IQ IS HIGHER THAN EINSTEIN'S". AND PLEASE SOMEONE KILL ALL THOSE RETARDED FAGGOTS WHO DRINKS DR PEPPER AT EVERY ANICON AND THINKS THAT IT MAKES THEM LOOK COOLER.

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YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT A REALLY SHITTY FUCKIN ANIME IS? INFINITE MOTHERFUCKIN' STRATOS. WHAT THE FUCK IS THE STORY YOU ASK?

 

Well, if you've spent more than five months watching anime you'll recognize the story of a special teenager named Ichika Orimura who ends up in what I can only describe as an LSD-triggered nightmare full of boring, one-dimensional women that want his dick very badly, gigantic machines that pop out of nowhere from their goddamn arms, and enemies who two seasons in barely have a defined role in the show. You see them three times. Maybe four. Oh, also this show lifts multiple ideas from Freezing and then mutilates them in every possible fucking fashion. And Freezing was fucking awful (but Freezing Vibration is tits on a stick).

 

What's so goddamn unbelievable about this shitstorm of a waste of animation is how much swag the protagonist has. Swagmaster Orimura is so good at picking up women that he walks into them and they want to be his forever. His first roommate, Houki, was his childhood friend who beats the shit out of him with a kendo blade if he gets too close to her and beats the shit out of him harder if he gets too close to another woman. His second roommate, Charlotte, was a man turned woman who is a terrible Sattelizer el Bridget (see: Freezing) clone devoid of all the characteristics that makes Satella badass, multifaceted, interesting, or anything more than a French housewife that's good with weapons of mass destruction. There's an arrogant, English chick named Cecilia who can't cook and is as useful as nipples on breastplate. There's another girl named Sashinami who clearly pulls all the strings at this school, pops out of literally FUCKING NOWHERE to save his ass, and goes the farthest with wanting to get into his pants. Except for Laura, the eyepatch wearing, sassy confused repressed German exchange student who smacks the fire out of Ichika's face one episode and falls deeply in love with him the next...FOR NO FUCKING REASON. Then there's Rin, who is another childhood friend that moved away whose parents run a Chinese food station in Japan (really?) but magically came back, and has no other purpose for existing other than to add ranks to his harem. Then there's another girl who is a sister of his childhood friend - who you see of all for five seconds because he's a man and men aren't important in this show - who also has a crush on him and she's like 9.

 

Oh, and once he squeezed a teacher's breast and she consented because he gets cougars like that too.

 

He's also the typical aloof doormat that wouldn't understand that a girl wants to sleep with him if she woke up next to him naked, which coincidentally happens in this show. And for as much as he doesn't particularly want any of the girls that oh so badly want him, he goes out of his way to massage and compilment and bake food for his sister Chifuyu, who I'm convinced he wants to sleep with because she's the only girl he hasn't swagged yet. The sad thing is, I don't think that Chifuyu would refuse him either if he had the balls to ask.

 

Ichika's internal incest struggle is really the most interesting part of this show. Oh, you were expecting mech violence? Well, you get five seconds of that and twenty seconds of watching all the girls in this show debate on whether or not striped panties are sexy.

 

No joke.

 

PLOTHOLES

 

Infinite Stratos has more plotholes than swiss cheese, each of them big enough to fly a 747 through, and each of them builds off of one another in a way that would make even the Leaning Tower of Pisa jealous. Why? Because this entire show rests on the premise that in a world where special supersoldier commando babes are the only ones that can pilot the IS (otaku for mech), there's one man that can pilot the weapon and somehow he's not subject to governmental testing, regulation, or oversight. As far as I'm concerned, no one cares about him at all. He also somehow waltzed his way into a female-only boarding school with a rotating set of female roommates and a harem of cardboard caricatures of various ethnicities, living what I only believe other people believe teenage guys believe is the dream life. And while this seems like a necessary set-up for a very tacky, tasteless anime, you're introduced to a character four episodes later that received "special training" with Chifuyu.

 

And he, the ONLY MOTHERFUCKIN' MAN TO BE ABLE TO PILOT AN IS, DOESN'T HAVE A PERSONAL TUTOR WHY? HOW DOES THIS MAKE ANY GODDAMN SENSE?

 

This is what I'm talking about when I say gigantic plotholes. Here are a few more:

  • There's a certain character who has no problems sleeping naked next to Orimura (swagmaster) or exposing herself to him but is embarassed when he sees her panties.

  • Someone's gear malfunctions and that causes her panties, generated by the same machine that holds her weapon (because Freezing totes didn't do this too), to disappear. Just her panties. Oh, and when she goes to put on ACTUAL panties those disappear too. Why? NO FUCKIN CLUE THEY JUST DO ROLL WITH IT.

  • A rotating squad of roommates? Yeah, the first one gets removed because "it's not appropriate to have guys and girls living together at such an age", but then the next few end up crashing in his crib AND NO ONE GIVES A FUCK.

  • Apparently in this show the creator of the IS disappeared so there are only a few hundred of them in the world and none of them can be unmanned drones. Suddenly, unmanned drones. Unmanned drones everywhere.

  • Remember when I said only one man can pilot the IS? Yeah, inexplicably there comes along a second man that can pilot one. No fanfare? No scrutiny? The only people that seem to care being the girls that are lining up to be part of HIS harem? This news should be as big as someone finding a goddamn T-Rex in their bathroom. Well, you then figure out that Charles is actually Charlotte, and she's covering as a man for corporate espionage bullshit. She ~can't be uncovered~ because then she'll be sent packing Satellizer el Bridget style back to wherever the fuck she came from, because that's not explained all that well....EXCEPT NEXT FUCKING EPISODE SHE RENEGES ON HER WORD AND DOES IT ANYWAY. And there are no repercussions for her. She continues to attend the school. What the flying fuck?

The single, defining fault of this show is that it goes nowhere at the insistence of ONE GODDAMN CHARACTER, who I want to like so much but can't. That would be Chifuyu. I can deal with the one-dimensional characters. I can deal with the stock high school setting. I can even deal with all the harem bullshit. What I cannot stand is a story with no purpose, and it takes an entire fucking season for "bad guys" to show up. Yeah, "bad guys". Not THE bad guys. Bad guys. And once they're chased away after trying to steal her little brother's IS, Chifuyu doesn't follow up. She doesn't even inquire about it. What does she do? Magically introduces ANOTHER FUCKING GIRL WITH A CRUSH ON HIM TO GUARD HIM.

 

Because she herself can't be assed to protect her kin.

 

"OH YEAH WE ALMOST JUST GOT DESTROYED BY SOMETHING I SAID COULDN'T EXIST. NBD GO TO CLASS."

"OH LOOK, SOMETHING JUST SPAWNED OUT OF SOMEONE ELSE'S IS AND IS TRYING TO ACTUALLY KILL YOU AND WE ESTABLISHED THAT YOU DON'T HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU'RE DOING. BUT YOU'RE FINE NBD."

"OH, SOMEONE TRIED TO STEAL YOUR IS' DATA? YOU TWO CAN CONTINUE TO SLEEP IN THE SAME ROOM TOGETHER. NBD."

"OH, SOMEONE ELSE TRIED TO ACTUALLY STEAL YOUR IS? DO YOU STILL HAVE IT? NBD THEY'RE GONE NOW."

"OH, YOU FELL LIKE 3 MILES FROM THE SKY INTO THE GROUND AND YOU WENT INTO A COMA? APPLY SOME MAGICAL ANIME GAUZE AND YOU'LL LIVE. NBD."

"OH, SOMEONE WHO LOOKS LIKE ME AND CLAIMS TO BE YOU TRIED TO KILL YOU BUT LAURA SAVED YOUR LIFE? NBD YOU'RE FINE."

 

It's like everytime the story looks like it's about to get started everyone just drops it and talks about beach volleyball or something irrelevant like that. There's very little combat. There's very little conflict if you exclude all of the futile attempts of everyone to sleep with Ichika. There's very little consistency, with one episode contradicting the next episode FOR ALMOST THE ENTIRE FUCKING SEASON AND A HALF THAT THIS POOR PIECE OF SHIT HAS BEEN ANIMATED FOR.

 

And you would think for the four minutes each episode that there's some actual fucking action going on that it would be animated well? Clearly it's where they spent 95% of the budget, because the rest of the show looks and moves like a six year old got a box of RoseArt crayons and went to town, because they can't even afford fucking Crayola. The show looks like absolute shit with budget values that the first season of Pokemon would laugh at.

 

Don't watch this, not even for the imagination fuel so you have new anime girls to fap to. Rule 34 this. The porn is probably better.

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Damn that's one hell of a rant zess. Do you seriously think people watch shows like "IS" for the plot? Lol no it's for the eye candy, and nothing else. It's called ecchi and people eat that shit up regardless of how bad it is...

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Sword Art Online. I'm too lazy to type how shitty this series is so I'll just leave this link here. http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLw5uLXwBzBYJgClU8tCcFrN2H0q3WXL5F

 

Dragonaut - The Resonance = DISGUSTINGLY HUGE BOOBS + EMO PROTAGONIST + LAUGHABLE ANGRY VILLAIN + SO MUCH STUPIDITY

 

Dog & Scissors. I want my 6 hours back.

 

Gundam SEED Destiny. FLASHBACKS, RECAPS, RECYCLED ANIMATION. Rinse and repeat until the series' end.

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in recent memory I would say the Danganronpa series from earlier this year... it's so bad. Which is quite a shame because the visual novel for the psp has an amazing story and plot, but the anime just rushes through it all and even leaves out a lot of main story plot and events that matter in the end... I found it so hard to watch through it. It was like banging my head against the wall for hours on end. Bottom line is don't watch the anime play the game, it has been fan translated for the psp earlier this year and is a very good and quality translation, and hey if that's not your thing then it's also getting an official translation and release on the ps vita sometime next year i believe. If neither of those are options then just watch a playthrough of it on youtube, I'm pretty sure there are quite a few.. Just don't waste your time on the anime and if you did waste your time on it then please don't think that is what the actual story is about and if so then I pity you.

 

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THERE ISN'T EVEN A PIECE OF ORIGINALITY IN STEINS;GATE. CHARACTERS ARE INSANELY BORING AND THE STORY SUCKS. STFU EVERYONE WHO'LL TAG THIS SHIT AS "SEINEN". "GAIZ I JUST WATCHED VERY SCIENTIFIC ANIME!!1 NOW I FEEL THAT MY IQ IS HIGHER THAN EINSTEIN'S". AND PLEASE SOMEONE KILL ALL THOSE RETARDED FAGGOTS WHO DRINKS DR PEPPER AT EVERY ANICON AND THINKS THAT IT MAKES THEM LOOK COOLER.

I still love it anyways :P

 

Sword Art Online. I'm too lazy to type how shitty this series is so I'll just leave this link here.

I think that guy's youtube video kind of sucked dick, but I still agree that the show kind of blows chunks.

Now let me rage against modern anime as a whole:

Dear modern anime,

TAKE SOME FUCKING RISKS! For the love of god don't set your show in a school setting! "oh, but it's not a school! You see, it's in the future where bunch of kids are together in this spaceship..." STILL PRETTY MUCH A FUCKING SCHOOL! "Well, you see, it's not about the school, it's about the fighting and the ridiculousness of it all." THEN WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NEED A SCHOOL?!?!

I'LL TELL YOU WHY! IT'S BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO FUCKING PUSSY TO TAKE ANY REAL RISKS SO YOU STICK TO THE SAME GOD DAMN SETTINGS WE HAVE SEEN A MILLION TIMES OVER!

Also, once you have passed the age of 21, it kind of become really gross when you realize that all of the ecchi shit is with chicks that are WAY to young. And come on, people are not that smart at that age. This is why stuff like Madoka was terrible just based on the age of the characters. Am I really supposed to think that a group of 14 year old girls have that mature of thought processes. I can't tell you a single 14 year old that I have met that acts as mature or are as intelligent as anime seems to make them out to be...not that they don't exist, but it is at least 1 in 1000 or something.

Moral of the story: GIVE US SOME GROWN UP CHARACTERS THAT AREN'T IN SCHOOL!

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Dear modern anime,

TAKE SOME FUCKING RISKS! For the love of god don't set your show in a school setting! "oh, but it's not a school! You see, it's in the future where bunch of kids are together in this spaceship..." STILL PRETTY MUCH A FUCKING SCHOOL! "Well, you see, it's not about the school, it's about the fighting and the ridiculousness of it all." THEN WHY THE FUCK DO YOU NEED A SCHOOL?!?!

I'LL TELL YOU WHY! IT'S BECAUSE YOU ARE TOO FUCKING PUSSY TO TAKE ANY REAL RISKS SO YOU STICK TO THE SAME GOD DAMN SETTINGS WE HAVE SEEN A MILLION TIMES OVER!

YES YES MOTHERFUCKIN' YES! I immediately start disregarding anime that revolves around a school setting because it's all the same shit in the end...except for Valvrave, because then the high school becomes a planet fighting against Russian space nazis and American space nazis and space vampires that can't die in gigantic robots that heal when the protagonist gets laid. It's so bad it's good.

 

But you REALLY need to watch some Hunter x Hunter 2011. It's a shame that this shit hasn't been dubbed but crappy ecchi bullshit like Eiken has. FUCK EIKEN THAT SHOW SUCKS. IT MAKES INFINITE STRATOS LOOK LIKE STAR WARS. IT'S MORE OF THE SAME ECCHI BULLSHIT EXCEPT EVERYONE HAS TRIPLE F FLAPJACK TITTIES EVEN IF THEY'RE SIX YEARS OLD AND ARE ONE BOTTLE OF LUBE AWAY FROM AN ORGY WITH THE NEAREST PHALLIC SHAPED OBJECT THEY CAN SHOVE INTO THEIR GROIN REGION.

 

AND THERE'S NO FUCKING POINT TO THIS SHOW AT ALL. OH I GOT AN UPSKIRT OF YOUR PANTIES NOW LET ME FONDLE ALL TEH WIMMINZ. GTFO THE CREATOR SHOULD GO PLAY IN TRAFFIC. OR MASTURBATE. BECAUSE CLEARLY YOU DON'T MAKE SCENES LIKE THIS WITHOUT HAVING LATENT SEXUAL URGES THAT NEED TO BE ADDRESSED:

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ec8QFpUPBZM?t=23m

 

FUCK YOU EIKEN AND FUCK YOU EWAM FOR PUTTING SUCH A SHITTY SHOW BETWEEN TWO GOOD SHOWS TO FORCE PEOPLE TO WATCH THIS DRIVEL. I FEEL MY MQ (MANLINESS QUOTIENT) FALL WHEN I WATCH HOW MUCH OF A BITCH THE MAIN CHARACTER IS.

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cAN WE HAVE SOME ANIMES THAT DONT HAVE FUCKING STUPID MOESHIT IN IT IN SOME SHAPE OR FORM CAN WE JUST SOMEHOW IGNORE THESE OTAKU LOLI-COMPLEX AUTISTS OR SOMETHING

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We need more shows like Monster, Gungrave, Black Lagoon, Cowboy Bebop, Ghost in the Shell, and Jormungand. Animes that don't feel like an anime.

but jormungand is just a copycat of black lagoon :/ however it's not bad

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but jormungand is just a copycat of black lagoon :/ however it's not bad

 

How is jormungand a copycat of black lagoon? The only thing they have remotely in common is the character designs are a tad similar... other than that they have nothing in common.

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That's what i said similar character design, and no the story is totally different... what's so similar about it? Because as far I know they have nothing in common. and i have no idea what you mean by "dynamics of events development? sounds like gibberish to me :\

 

Edit: The only other thing i can think of that they have in common is the genre... action, but that's not enough to say that it is a copycat, in my opinion the two shows are very different. From the events happening in each of the shows to the moral outlooks and personalities of the characters, all the way down to the main message of these two series... everything is totally different.

 

It's one thing to say that two series feel similar, but another totally different thing to say one show is a copycat of a another. especially when that just isn't true.

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Yozakura Quartet is almost over (well, another few weeks, but yes) I AM SO SAD THOUGH I DON'T REALLY HAVE A CLUE WHY I LOVE THE SERIES SO MUCH. THAT AND I NEED MORE AKINA. For some reason I can't explain.

 

Also, Soukyuu no Fafner getting another season might not be as weird as I first assumed it was because after watching the latest installment (a movie) I UNDERSTAND EVEN LESS OF THE WHOLE DAMN THING. Japan and its depressing as hell, weird and messed up, filled with emo kids, mecha series.

 

That said: WHERE'S KYOUKAI NO KANATA'S PLOT GOING?

 

 

edit: Apparently I am in need of a new Gundam series that isn't as childish looking as AGE so I ended up rewatching SEED. Not a good idea. I HATE FLAY SO MUCH. SHE'S THE MOST ANNOYING ANIME CHARACTER I HAVE EVER SEEN IN ANY ANIME I HAVE EVER WATCHED.

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Also, Soukyuu no Fafner getting another season might not be as weird as I first assumed it was because after watching the latest installment (a movie) I UNDERSTAND EVEN LESS OF THE WHOLE DAMN THING. Japan and its depressing as hell, weird and messed up, filled with emo kids, mecha series.

 

edit: Apparently I am in need of a new Gundam series that isn't as childish looking as AGE so I ended up rewatching SEED. Not a good idea. I HATE FLAY SO MUCH. SHE'S THE MOST ANNOYING ANIME CHARACTER I HAVE EVER SEEN IN ANY ANIME I HAVE EVER WATCHED.

Fafner is pretty straightforward if you only paid attention. If you still don't understand much of the plot then you can read the reviews here. www.mahq.net/animation/fafner/fafner.htm

 

As for Gundam, ever tried Gundam 00 or Gundam Unicorn?

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Gundam Build Fighters has everything I ever wanted in the next Gundam series. It's light hearted and full of fun that's a call back to all the older Gundam animes. It's nice seeing mobile suits from different universes fighting each other. Brilliant marketing strategy from Bandai/Sunrise since it's all about selling the toys. I've gotten sick of all these war orphans trying to be idealists and depressing war dramas.

 

Gundam AGE had a good first arc. 2nd arc had wasted potential. 3rd arc is sooooooooo gawd awful! Kio Asuno is without a doubt THE worst gundam protagonist ever. He receives like the most overpowered mobile suit and pulls a Kira Yamato throughout the show after his meeting with just ONE emotional manipulative sickly vagan girl. His stupidity reaches new levels by shouting out in his intercom spamming his naivete of "LET'S UNDERSTAND EACH OTHER!!!" to the enemy. He feels more sympathy for the enemy rather than his grandpa who suffered so much loss. Makes complete sense, right? RIIIIIIGHT? Ugh... So many things wrong with this show, especially that last arc.

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I think that the whole premises in Gundam AGE (aka the three generation arcs) was actually a pretty cool idea, but they definitely fudged it up and it's sad because it could of been way better... and yeah after the first arc it definitely went downhill really quick.

 

I'm glad though that build fighters is doing really good, love the whole cross universe thing that's going on with the mobile suits... but I have a feeling it isn't gonna to stay so "light hearted" past a certain point, too many variables like whatever is going on with Reiji and the world he came from.. just have a feeling that something more intense is going to present itself later down the line.

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Fafner is pretty straightforward if you only paid attention. If you still don't understand much of the plot then you can read the reviews here. www.mahq.net/animation/fafner/fafner.htm

 

As for Gundam, ever tried Gundam 00 or Gundam Unicorn?

 

Yeah, I know about Fafner, but the movie kind of messed it up. I mean, it's your typical "people showing up again" "popping out of nowhere" "never making sense" thing. Are they alive or not? Are they there or not? No clue, you just take it. Or maybe the movie just messed it up because I watched it in the middle of the night. (plus, I think my main issue is just "how many lives does Kazuki have?) I really like the series though, for some reason.

 

I love Gundam 00 and am about to finish what I have from Unicorn, but I would be fine with a new series right now.

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