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On 5/17/2019 at 3:04 AM, plastic_rainbow said:

can people just stop being greedy for money....my friend wants to keep her job cuz of the higher pay but i KNOW she's not happy with it. it's about an hour commute and she always comes home dirty with grime in her hair as she's a machine operator and the place she works at isn't the cleanest. yet, she isn't willing to sacrifice all that pay for a more moderate and cleaner job that pays just good enough to make a living, in other words the job i've been working at. i mean, she lives with her mom and sister so the rent shouldn't even cause a huge dent in her bank. plus she doesn't even have any loans to pay. she tells me that she wants to earn a lot so that she can both save and spend money at the same time, which looks to me more like spending than saving. well whatever, it's her life so i can't try to change her mind. it's all just kinda ridiculous to me though.


I don't disagree, but I'm gonna come at this with a different perspective.

I've noticed that there is a certain amount of money that one makes relative to the strength of the economy where making even $1/hr less complicates finances but making $1/hr more doesn't ease finances. There's a plateau for purchasing power that can only be overcome by making substantially more money via a big raise. Getting a new job on the surface looks easier but there are always hidden costs. For example, this new job can be farther away than her current job which means she may have to spend more on gas. Not that this is her situation, but it definitely was mine at one point and is at least 30% of the reason why I can't walk away from my job.

Having said that, waiting to do a job switch is not a good idea because things only solidify as I get older. The flexibility I had when I was 25 was way more than what I have now, and in 3 years I will probably be less flexible. I bet a lot that she knows you are right and that she can make the change "whenever she wants", but life has a way of changing on a dime and she could end up stuck in her job because she didn't take the opportunity she should have.

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Is it strange that I've never had my ears pierced? Literally every - and I mean every - woman I've ever known has, no exceptions. I haven't because a) my hair always covers my ears so it'd be kinda pointless, and b) I'm a total wuss when it comes to physical pain. Is that weird? It probably is for some reason, but I feel like it shouldn't be.

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Does anyone get made fun of for liking Japanese music?

 

I do all the time. My friends tease me and call me a "weeb" or "emo" every fucking day so there's that.

 

Granted I'm the only one at my school who knows what visual kei is and the only Asian thing people listen to is KPOP *shudders*

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glad my favorite gen 2 boi is getting some meme love

 

---

 

2 hours ago, psychonnect_rozen said:

Does anyone get made fun of for liking Japanese music?

 

I do all the time. My friends tease me and call me a "weeb" or "emo" every fucking day so there's that.

 

Granted I'm the only one at my school who knows what visual kei is and the only Asian thing people listen to is KPOP *shudders*

Unless those comments are satirical/ in humor, those aren't real friends.

 

To be honest, I realized very early on that completely divulging to others (or pushing) my Japanese hobbies without context would really come off as weird and awkward to most people. Luckily, in high-school I perfected the craft of introducing my friends, who had varying levels of interest in video games or anime, to j-rock & visual kei. While I wasn't as successful a vk missionary in college (immediately got the "hurr durr are u gay" question), I figured the more genres I had in my "repertoire" the better I could connect w/ people and possibly introduce them to vk. To this day, my wealth of music interests has been the king of icebreakers.

 

Some successful examples:

  • Late 00's - Early 2010's metalcore and post-hardcore was still huge, so I showed my metalhead friends the Crossfaith - Blue live clip (only their first album was out at the time), and they dug the shit out of that. Promptly blew up w/ their second album a year-and-a-half later.
  • A friend of mine at the time liked the 14th opening to BLEACH, which was guess what, ViViD - Blue. Ended up getting him and a few others hooked on DIV.
  • Friend of mine who mainly liked VGM (Video Game Music) found my earllly visual kei YouTube channel and really liked the SolariS tracks I posted, which was really interesting. I got him into the Raid.'s first mini and xTRiPx. Helped that he had a Korean-Canadian friend that introduced him to vocaloid/utaite stuff.

 

While K-pop isn't for everyone, it has made strides to change the perspective of androgyny and masculinity in the U.S, and elsewhere. I had friends who were only into K-pop be completely accepting of visual kei aesthetics b/c they had that frame of reference.

Edited by colorful人生

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8 hours ago, Zeus said:


I don't disagree, but I'm gonna come at this with a different perspective.

I've noticed that there is a certain amount of money that one makes relative to the strength of the economy where making even $1/hr less complicates finances but making $1/hr more doesn't ease finances. There's a plateau for purchasing power that can only be overcome by making substantially more money via a big raise. Getting a new job on the surface looks easier but there are always hidden costs. For example, this new job can be farther away than her current job which means she may have to spend more on gas. Not that this is her situation, but it definitely was mine at one point and is at least 30% of the reason why I can't walk away from my job.

Having said that, waiting to do a job switch is not a good idea because things only solidify as I get older. The flexibility I had when I was 25 was way more than what I have now, and in 3 years I will probably be less flexible. I bet a lot that she knows you are right and that she can make the change "whenever she wants", but life has a way of changing on a dime and she could end up stuck in her job because she didn't take the opportunity she should have.

Yeah, I think I get where you're coming from. I can definitely see how finances will affect you're earnings. But as I mentioned before, my friend lives with her sister and mom so they split the rent and bills. And where we're from, which is a rather small town, the living costs aren't as expensive as bigger cities either. You can find 2-3 bedroom apartments for $500-700/month basically.

 

I didn't mention before, but my friend partly took the job because her sister (who's older by 5+ years) was the one who wanted the job change (my friend doesn't have her license yet so they've been working the same jobs), and I feel like she was kinda forced to work at their current job because of her sister only. But then again, I don't know the full story as to how they came into an agreement for the job change so I probably shouldn't speculate too much on that. I still think she should be more independent and make her own decisions though. Being dependent on her older sister for having a job and transportation has probably been affecting her choices....

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17 hours ago, Gesu said:

I love having a teacher "best friend". At high school it was my English teacher and at college it's my psychology teacher.

it's nice but i always feel like i'm using up their time with their busy schedules so i try not to bother them too much lol....

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Pfffff. Second dog I had to bring away this month. This time the neighbour's who spent time with us too since he was a little pup. Poor things, poor things... 

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13 hours ago, psychonnect_rozen said:

Does anyone get made fun of for liking Japanese music?

 

I do all the time. My friends tease me and call me a "weeb" or "emo" every fucking day so there's that.

 

Granted I'm the only one at my school who knows what visual kei is and the only Asian thing people listen to is KPOP *shudders*

There was a thread about this a while back. Let me see if I can find it for you.

 

edit: found it

 

Check these cool threads out for similar topics we've come up with in the past:

 

 

 

 

 

 

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14 hours ago, psychonnect_rozen said:

Does anyone get made fun of for liking Japanese music?

 

I do all the time. My friends tease me and call me a "weeb" or "emo" every fucking day so there's that.

 

Granted I'm the only one at my school who knows what visual kei is and the only Asian thing people listen to is KPOP *shudders*


The trick to avoiding social shame is to have two completely separate music libraries. One is essentially "J-rock and visual kei" and the other is "everything else". When I'm given the aux for a car ride, or asked what I listen to, I pull from the "everything else" group. When someone is feeling adventurous, or I know the tastes of the person I'm talking to, or I'm on MH, I go into my J-rock collection. Every once in a while I'll sprinkle in some visual kei/J-Rock with other international recommendations, people fall for it, and are none the wiser. I keep up on contemporary music just enough to hold a conversation about Green Day or J-Cole, but that's it.

This separation is more logical than physical, but it helps a lot. It's almost a non-solution to your issue, but people are never gonna stop teasing you for liking visual kei, so the best you can do is give off an image that you listen to music from all over the world so you can lose that weeb label.

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That feeling when a 7,5 hour work day isn't enough anymore. Think I need to get another job and double the amount of hours for at least 5 days a week.

 

These problems, man. Hilarious, but still feels like a proper problem for me personally.

Edited by Bear

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Found out earlier today that I'm back at college on September 2nd after the end of the last term... the day before my fucking birthday. I've never been at school/college on my birthday before! The closest I've ever come to that was the induction week last year (as in the start of this academic year), which started on my birthday. I am so pissed. I just hope I have Tuesdays off so I don't have to be in. 😠

Edited by Gesu

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So I'm not sure if I'm having an existential crisis, or if I'm realizing that the move from Chicago to Denver and away from family is hitting me harder than I can get over.

I'm sure hoping that things will work out by the end of the year because right now I am starting to feel like the move was not the best choice right now.

Yeahhhhhhh.

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Me training someone how to make a key part of my job’s products via a 3D program: Ok! First, we check our spreadsheet in google docs to see what we need to make today.

 

Trainee: *doesn’t even know how to open google*

 

 

 

 

please kill me.

Edited by ArtFart

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Every now and again, I'll clench my teeth in my sleep and wake up with a profusely aching jaw. It usually happens during a nap as opposed to an overnight sleep. Should I bring that up with my doctor? I don't really know if they can do anything about it.

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53 minutes ago, Gesu said:

Every now and again, I'll clench my teeth in my sleep and wake up with a profusely aching jaw. It usually happens during a nap as opposed to an overnight sleep. Should I bring that up with my doctor? I don't really know if they can do anything about it.

You should, yeah. That might take a big toll on your temporomandibular joint over time and you could end up with even more pain and other problems in the future (like ruined teeth).

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1 hour ago, Gesu said:

Every now and again, I'll clench my teeth in my sleep and wake up with a profusely aching jaw. It usually happens during a nap as opposed to an overnight sleep. Should I bring that up with my doctor? I don't really know if they can do anything about it.

Check with your primary doctor about the cause of the clenching/bruxism (can be a range of things from stress, anxiety, sleep apnea, etc.), but I'd also see a dentist if they'd suggest a night guard to mitigate your clenching/grinding. You don't want to end up w/ TMJ disorders (like @saishuu mentioned) b/c they suck, but additionally, clenching/grinding can eat away at the tooth enamel which can lead to all sorts of issues. 

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After quitting my day job I thought I'd get ten times more productive with my other endeavors. Turns out that isn't the case, and whatever hours were spent laboring before are now spent largely idle in want of something to do, agonising myself between fifteen different projects and goals. I'm not passionate enough about anything in particular that'd make me give it the solitary focus that's needed to really _do_ anything worth doing. I'm not even drinking or moving from country to country anymore, so I just sit home and read books and watch movies, go to gym for one week out of every month with 4 weeks of sitting on the couch in the interim ( because what's the point if I can't be pro-athlete/the best. ) I still remember when taken to my first football practice as a little boy and immediately after it had ended I walked up to my mom announced that I'm retiring from football since I didn't score a single goal, and I'd surely be too much of a burden to the team to come back around the second time; and since then I've adopted this philosophy holistically to everything I do. I spend a day pondering over which book should I read in order to get the most out of it or fit into a project I have going on currently... I decide on neither and waste a day. I'm confident in that anything I'd decide to do in life I'd be decent enough at it to not feel like I made the world a worse place to live in while supporting myself both financially and emotionally in the process, but I can't get up from the couch after the first shadow of a doubt comes over me; nothing means anything, but it's both a freedom and a curse all the same. 

 

If nothing else I'll be changing scenery in about a half a month to live in Kiev for a while. I can't stay in the same country too long without exploding. 

 

As I wrote this I forgot the buckwheat on the stove and I burned it

Edited by Disposable

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On 5/29/2019 at 3:11 PM, Disposable said:

If nothing else I'll be changing scenery in about a half a month to live in Kiev for a while.

if you by any chance be in Lviv, drop me a line and we can go for some beers and reminisce about good awld days and retards 

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I don't think I'll ever have a best friend again. Not that that's necessarily a bad thing; just a thought I've been having. I've had a few people tell me I'm motherly, and I think anyone who's even slightly younger than me who gets close enough to me realises this eventually because they start acting like they're my children, so I have to push them away before it gets to the point where I start paying for their dinner almost every day (which has actually happened before). If I do get a best friend again, that'll be great, but it's not a goal of mine and if it happens, it'll take a long time. I really have to be careful about who I let get that close to me again because I end up being treated like a nodding dog who just has to go along with everything. Truth be told, I haven't spoken with the girl I called my best friend in about a month or more and I just feel so much better for it. It's not that I hate her; she was just... taking over my life, somewhat. I'm an introvert who needs space from people, and I wasn't getting that from her. I don't know if anyone gets that from a best friend. I dunno, maybe I'm just unsociable, but I'm happy that way. Perhaps I'm happier than I should be that way, but it works for me. Dgmw, I'm not a hermit, and I can see friends and family for a day or two each week and not feel overwhelmed. I just feel very comfortable in my own company and I need to know that, no matter how many people I meet and interact with, I can always return to my own space without having to think about anything daunting.

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